Sometimes when you parent a child with a disability, it’s like flying an airplane in the fog. There’s a lot of “angst” in not knowing exactly where you are heading or what your life will look like. Although we’ve often said this, we didn’t realize until we talked with a pilot, just how similar they are! We had dinner the other evening with a friend who is also a pilot and we were talking about flying when you can’t see where you are going. We found what he said to be very interesting. Our friend Steve, said that when you are flying and have no visibility, it is especially important that you rely on what you know to be true (the navigation instruments). When you can’t see where you are going, your feelings will invariably tell you the wrong thing to do. For example, you will think you are going up, when in reality you are going down and vice versa. He said this is where they get the term, “flying by the seat of your pants”. It is also what they think may have happened to JFK Junior. A pilot, even a veteran pilot, needs to always go back to what he knows is true and accurate.
As he spoke of this experience, we thought about what that might mean for us as parents of a child with disabilities. The solution is pretty much the same thing. We need to go back to what we know is true and right, to cling to what we know is right before the Lord and what he says in His Word. Sometimes when we are in pain and struggling emotionally, we think and act as if the PAIN somehow gives us permission to forego being obedient to God. And although it is tempting to give in to those things we know aren’t right, now more than ever it is important to do what we know is good and true and right. Maybe it is showing grace for that annoying friend. Or perhaps forgiving your spouse, or spending time with the Lord, or purposing to find things to be thankful for. We probably know what those “things” are that God wants us to be doing. Now is the time to do them and ask God to help us do them. We’re praying that the Fog will soon lift and you will see the Son.
Thank you for all of your posts, but perhaps the one that speaks to me the loudest is flying in the fog. I am not parenting a disabled child but still find myself relating to many of the experiences you have shared because of the grieving process associated with losing a child. The fog has not lifted for me, so I must trust in what I KNOW to be true. GOD does not change. Thank you for the challenge to move forward even without visibility! I believe that is the definition of faith!
Well said Tia. Thanks for sharing!
Thank you for sharing and being vulnerable.
Thank you Cheryl.
Yes. Living it is heavy. Thankful for your example.
Thank you Karen. We know life can be difficult. Hold on to what you know is true.